This Roadkill Bunny Rabbit Costume begs the question, why did the bunny cross the street? To get to the other side. Get it? The other side? As in the afterlife. Now you can be a roadkill rabbit this Halloween. Complete with blood and gross entrails sticking out everywhere.
Why wait until Halloween? I’m gonna wear this and lay on my neighbor’s lawn next Easter. That way those neighbor kids will know that the bunny died for their sins.
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Are you a Gloomy Gus? A Morbid Madge? Well, I would advise changing your name. Who the hell named you? Your mom or the guys that make the Garbage Pail Kids? Well, with a name like that you’ll love these decomposing bunny and kitty dishes. These decomposing bunny and kitty dishes will give you all the rotting with none of the stink.
You also get all of the stuff that helps the decomposition process. Like snails, bugs, mushrooms and fungi. Really? Doesn’t sound like a fun guy to me.
These dishes are educational and will scare your house guests. If you’re like me, that’s important. Sure, stop by. Just make sure you tell me a quick story and get the hell out. I got stuff to do, like trolling forums and criticizing movies that aren’t out yet. Ah, the internet age. It gave my life such meaning.
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Nothing says Christmas like a trio of bunny butts with Santa hats on them. Deck the halls with dingle-berries fa la la la la la la la la. At $50 a rabbit butt, this trio of tushies will cost you $150. I know this because as a kid I was hooked on math phonics, but I kicked the habit years ago. Yay me!
Click through for a touching holiday poem.
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Congratulations. You are pregnant. Have this glittery rabbit pregnancy test. You’ll never have a free moment again. Your time will be spent cleaning poop from another smaller human’s butt-cheeks, wiping up drool, stepping on LEGO pieces as you curse the god of reproduction and you generally smell like pee.
Laugh at nerds like me all you want, but since a woman won’t touch me, I don’t have to worry about this stuff and can just play video games while my mom makes me lunch and cleans up around here.
They don’t call it Fruit Of The Loom for nothing! Zombie bunnies love our cotton butt-baskets and that’s why their favorite method of attack is a running jump at our crack! Which usually ends with us down on the grass with a bloody chunk torn out of our rump and our underwear in it’s rotten zombie mouth as it chews and chews.
Etsy seller amysdeliciousvintage has commemorated zombie bunny attacks with this fine sculpture. I call it “Attack of the killer butt-muncher!”
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