Normally alien facehuggers impregnate you in the face so that another alien bursts out of your chest, but this Etsy seller thinks walking dogs is a much better use for them.
Just let this Alien Facehugger Dog Leash sink it’s teeth into your dog as it wraps it’s arms around your dog’s back. By the time you walk to the park, an alien head will have burst from it’s rectum in an explosion of poo, leaving you lying dead on the grass, still clutching your poo bag. NOT a good idea. No one wants to die with a poo bag in their hand.
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This custom 
Let somebody else be in charge of your body and use you as a meat puppet this Halloween. This Alien Mind Control mask is pretty realistic. I should know. I’ve tussled with aliens before. Some of them do tend to put your head up their butts so they can control you.
Halloween is almost here and you know what that means. Yep. My dentist and your dentist are gonna be going to Hawaii in their new private jet. Meanwhile I’m all about cruising through traffic on my moped, trying not to pass out from tooth pain. Was probably that Twix bar and Neco wafer salad I had for lunch.
Hey, it’s the