Tag: dracula

Vampire Costume For Babies

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Vampire Costume For Babies
This Vampire Costume For Babies will turn your little bundle of joy into a well dressed blood sucker. College usually does the same thing, but why wait? You won’t believe your little ray of sunshine after you put this on him. He’ll be drinking from a blood red bottle, adverse to sunlight and may even turn into a bat as he escapes his huggies. What a cute little scamp-pire.

Until he tries to bite your neck at feeding time. It’s all good though. Could be worse. He could be the Wolfman. Baby Wolfmen leave hair everywhere. And whole chicken carcasses.

Life Size Universal Monster Horror Statues

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Life Size Universal Horror Monster Statues
Check out these Life Size Universal Monster Horror Statues from Workshop77. I guess their first 76 workshops got trashed by monsters. My only complaint is that there is no Creature From The Black Lagoon. Actually, my second complaint is that I can see the Invisible Man. He’s right there. Well, he was there a second ago. I swear. Anyway, all of your favorites are here, life sized and scary as the day you first saw them. Put ’em around your house and do the mash. The Monster Mash. It’s a graveyard smash!

Why ya gotta do vandalism? Somebody’s body is resting there.

Shut up hippy.

It’ll catch on in a flash.

What will?

The Monster Mash. I invited the ghost of Johnny Cash. He did the Monster Mash. Wa-oooooo
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Gothic Horror Chess Set

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Gothic Horror Chess Set
Who knows how to play chess? Not me. I usually just bluff my way through a few rounds and then flip the table, knocking all the pieces down as I yell Checkmate. Then I walk away the clear winner cuz I didn’t waste two hours playing a nerd game. Even though I usually go home and play with action figures.

But if you have to play brainiac nerd games, this Gothic Horror Chess Set should do the trick. It features Frankenstein’s Monster, Dracula, Jekyll and Hyde, and Zombies. Oh and two nerds on either side of the board. I’m sorry. I’m just jealous cuz my sister sank my battleship then beat me at Connect Four.

Where?

There, diagonally!

Vino De Nosferatu Decanter and Glasses

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

Nosferatu Decanter
This Vino De Nosferatu Decanter and Glasses set will let you have a drink with Dracula. Have a nip with Nosferatu. You get free matching table accessories too. Raise a toast. You’ll be Vlad you did. Eck! Your blood tastes terrible. Why do you have to be so negative?

This set looks pretty cool. Way to luxurious and rich for my blood. Which tastes terrible by the way. So don’t invite me over. My blood is a terrible vintage.
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Movie Monster Ties

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Movie Monster Ties
These Movie Monster Ties are awesome. Wear ’em and be all fashionably creepy. I would buy one but I would need my mummy’s help putting it on. And she’s no help at all between the arthritis and all of those bandages on her fingers.

I love my mummy though. Of corpse I do. Why wouldn’t I? Confession time: My dad is the Wolfman (Daddy also might be Dracula. We don’t know for sure.) and me and my brother are twins. In the delivery room they called us a creature double feature. Here’s a poem I wrote about my life story.

After we were born mummy became a rummy who smoked too much and called us dummies.