Tag: horror

Werewolf And Vampire Wall Hanging Art

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Werewolf And Vampire Wall Hanging Art
I’m gonna hang these Werewolf And Vampire Wall Hanging Art pieces at opposite ends of the room and watch them stare each other down. That way they won’t be tempted to come to life and eat me. They’ll be too busy sizing each other up and growling and stuff. That way I can go about my business and have some cool decor, without any worries. Phew! Not that they’re real tough with no arms, but they could bite if you get close enough.

Maybe I’ll give them some mannequin arms and make them hug each other, cuz I’m really all about being a monster peacemaker.
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Giant Spider Statement Ring

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Giant Spider Statement Ring
Oh look. A Giant Spider Statement Ring. I think I can guess what the statement is: Get it the hell off me! Yep, that’s the statement alright. Seeing a spider ring this big really shows you what massive butts they have. That’s because they have to store all kinds of stuff in the badonkadonk. They have to store all of that spider silk, their poop, their pee, their kids… I’m pretty sure that is scientifically valid, cuz I read it once on the web. The web knows about spiders. Duh!

That’s pretty nasty to be carrying all that around in one sack. That’s like you having a huge triple-duty booty and carrying like 3 blankets, all your poop, all your pee and letting your nasty kids bounce around in all that, while you go about your bidness shopping at Walmart.

Spiders is nasty.
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Beetlejuice Shrunken Head Guy

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Beetlejuice Shrunken Head Guy
You remember that shrunken head guy from Beetlejuice? Me either. I had my own shrunken head while watching that flick, thanks to the Vodka. Ever drink so much that it pickles your brain and your head feels all shriveled up? Yeah, I felt like this guy looks. Right down to the huge eyeballs, but that’s just cuz I saw a rat. Then I froze like that until somebody else came along and got rid of it. We all cope in our own ways.

Has anyone ever actually tried Beetle Juice? Judging by this guy’s face, I bet it’s sour. Bet he never tried that again! You ever talk with your mouth full while you’re blogging? I do. I said “Beetlejuice”only it sounded like “Fetal Juice”. I was horrified. Then I laughed and almost choked. I’m so lonely. *sigh* At least I can share these special moments with you guys.

Skull Cameo Necklace

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Skull Cameo Necklace
This skull cameo necklace is all 3D like a real skull. Pretty neat. Pretty cool. Pretty good. Hey, look everybody. Stan Lee is here to make a cameo appearance. And who’s that? Benedict Cumberbatch! Wait, there’s more.

*Throws open the shutters like it’s Christmas morning and I’ve been up all night with the ghost of Christmas something or other!* Shouts, “It really is a cameo necklace! It’s a star-studded cast! Merry Christmas to everyone!”

Teacher says, every time a bell rings, an angel gets its wings. You know what else happens? I get a headache.

What? It’s only May? Bah-Humbug. I’m going back to bed until December. Wake me up when I can open presents.
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Cthulhu Potion Necklaces

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Cthulhu Potion Necklaces
Wear these Cthulhu Potion Necklaces from TheCuriousCogsmith and you will never be without potion. Or tentacles. Is it a love potion? I have no idea. Only one way to find out. *Glog glog glog.* Oh yeah. It’s definitely working, cuz I’m in love with these necklaces. Should everything be going hazy and wavy? Is that eye winking at me from within that flailing tentacle? Uh-oh. Here come the magic little elves riding unicorns. Somebody talk me down. I think I’ve been dosed. Shanghaied. Cthulhu-ed. Oh, there he is now, beyond that shimmering gateway. What does he mean “enjoy the trip?” Later guys. I don’t feel so good.
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