Damn. That is one fancy funeral for a dead rat. This Preserved Rat Skeleton In Wooden Coffin makes a nice and morbid decoration. You know what his ghost said when it realized it was dead? Oh rats!
Sssshhhhhhhh!
Sorry. Gotta be respectful of all the other mourners here to pay their respects. Everybody’s leaving cubes of cheese in the casket. Man, the undertaker must have been drunk. I’ve seen better preserved Twinkies after they’ve been left outside for a month.
Holy Coca-Skulla those are some nice legs. Not bony at all, which is surprising when you consider those fine Skull leggings. Is it hot in here or is it just me? Are you hot blooded, check it and see. Do you got a femur of a hundred and three? See what I did there? That was a little classic rock humor.
Foreigner right?
No, I was born here. zing! Anyway, I’m gonna make like the blogging DJ I am and leave ya with a classic from The Kinks.
I met her in a club down in old Soho
Where you drink champagne and your leggings are full of skull-las
S-K-U-L-L Skull-las.
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance.
I asked her name and in a dark brown voice she said, “Skull-la”
S-K-U-L-L Skull-la, ska ska ska ska Skull-la….
It’s pants, it’s a skirt. It’s a pant-skirt. Skants. It’s for pale cave-people who need more sunlight. Apparently. They call it a transformer, but I’ve never seen Optimus Prime wearing this thing. Can’t decide between pants or a skirt? Just wear this. They look like some kind of weird prison pants. Prisoner number Skants step forward. I mean shuffle. Shuffle forward. Hands where I can see ’em.
Gollum loves them: Ssskants are my precious. Sometimes me wants a ssskirt, sometimes me wants pantsss. Me wants ssshuffle underground. Ssskanks is mine. I means ssskants! No sssunlight! *Hissssss* *Crawls off into the darkness.*
The joy of victory. The agony of de feet! This Concrete Feet Planter is supposed to be a humorous and fun planter for your garden. Maybe it is. It beats the way I do it. By throwing old sneakers into the backyard and then watching flowers grow in them. And die from the smell in the same day. When I say flowers, I mean fungus. Fungi? Why yes I am. I’m a fun guy. A fun guy with a backyard full of old mushroom filled sneakers.
This made me think of this! I know right? *Shudders*
This Honey Bear found the honey pot. Probably because it was a honey pot that was designed to lure him in. Know what I mean? *Psst* (A honey pot means a woman’s naughty parts) This has happened to me a few times too, which is why I’m looking through a large pickle jar as I type this. What? I was hungry. I’ll work my way out eventually.
The only problem is it’s taken like a half hour just to write this cuz it gets foggy in here. That’s why I installed some makeshift windshield wipers on the inside using some wire hangers and a swiffer. The swiffer really helped with my breath smell too.
I have to go to the ER now, cuz last time I tried breaking the glass I just ended up with the world’s sharpest necklace. Laterz.