Creepy Kittens With Crystal Skulls

Creepy Kittens
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Kitties. In theaters meow! Not really. Hello my little creepers. I saw this trio of terror and I thought of you. Have fun sleeping tonight. The seller calls them abdabs, which coincidentally is my pet name for my ab-flab. These guys are almost as scary.

You would think crystal kittens would have crystal mittens, but nope. Just crystal skulls. So they can telepathically murder us no doubt as their skulls light up. FYI my cat just saw this and lost her sh*t!

What’s that girl? They are an ancient race of slavers and that’s why you guys left your home planet of nip-nip-nibbles-meow-meows(Rough translation) and befriended the Egyptians? To escape them? Hmmmm. Say, how much do you figure you are worth to them? Hypothetically?

Kitty Fluffums no! My eyes!
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Levi’s Of Doom And Gloom

Skull Levi's
Damn girl. You got a fine ba-doom-kadonk. Looking all rave yard in your graveyard. I’m just sayin’ I’d like to hold a rave in that grave. Wait this isn’t a guy right? Man, I hope not. That can NEVER happen again. Now shhhh!

These Levi’s Of Doom And Gloom ain’t got no room cuz they full of booty and pulling double duty. Keeping things tight with fright. They’ll fit you just right in your skull hole. Skinny or tight, how they fit don’t matter. After you buy ’em you know you gettin’ fatter.

And THAT is how you write an ad to sell your cool ass end of the world jeans. Because I noticed you didn’t. You’re welcome.
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Custom Painted Skeleton Guitar

painted skeleton guitar
This Custom Painted Skeleton Guitar is pretty cool. Bands and singers that use this? Well, there’s PElvis Presley of course. Bone Thugs N Harmony. Spinal Tap. Just to name a few. Pretty awesome.

But what really freaks me out is the second image below. It’s like a friggin’ I Spy game. Everytime I thought I spotted everything, I found something else. Would it kill ya to clean up when we come over? I spy with my little eye:

A ghost child or apparition on the left.
A coffin bookcase.
A bust with one arm.
A tan dog’s feet.
A black dog asleep. (Are they both just one big dog?)
A used tissue.
Oh and a skeleton guitar.

Play along in the comments. Did I miss anything?
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Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween

Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween
I love cookies. I’m a real cookie monster and not just because I have blue fur and googly eyes. I just love ’em. So maybe I can get my wife to buy these Spooky Embossed Rolling Pins For Halloween from AlgisCrafts. Even if the wife doesn’t bake any cookies, it will make a nice change of pace having all of my bruises in fun shapes like skulls, bats and spiders.

They have all kinds of rolling pins. Personally I think they look like they might really hurt. I’m not so hungry for cookies anymore.
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Spider’s Lair Necklace

Spider's Lair Necklace
This Spider’s Lair Necklace is awesome. That spider has the perfect lair. Boobies! Is your name Charlotte? I was just admiring your web. I would love to have a lair like that. My lair is all empty Mountain Dew cans and cheese puff packages.

Sometimes I sit real quiet and wait for my prey to enter my messy web. Then I wrap it up in a cheese puff cocoon. It’s a game me and my cat play. I like it more than she does.