Tag: strange

Aliens Facehugger Heart Necklace

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Aliens Facehugger Heart Necklace
If you give this Aliens Facehugger Heart Necklace to someone you love, it could lead to a Valentine’s day massacre. Hugs are great and all, but not when they come from alien scum that wants to kill you with hugs to the face. At least this guy here is hugging a heart, but he will gladly trade that to wrap around your heart and squeeze real tight.

Present this with a box of chocolates and she will love you forever. Or at least until her face gets hugged off. What kind of creature evolves to hug face anyway? Suckin’ face? That I understand. every teen evolves into that? But what species says, I want to hug face when I grow up.” Have they seen the faces of most humans. I have and let me tell you, we are f***in hideous. Sure, we have a few lookers, but most of us? Real f***in’ ugly. I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Or in the tentacle of your Facehugger. I hope this guy finds an attractive face. Other than mine obviously. I make my living with this face. No, seriously, this one network pays me to stay off TV. YouTube too.

The X-Files Saint Scully and Saint Mulder Prayer Candle Set

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The X-Files Saint Scully and Saint Mulder Prayer Candle Set
These X-Files Saint Scully and Saint Mulder Prayer Candles will help to insure that your prayers reach them and aren’t intercepted by grey aliens. You know how it is when you pray to Saint Scully and Saint Mulder. Mulder wants to believe so he’ll listen to anything, but Sculley is a skeptic so she’s the one you really have to convince.

Tell them all of your darkest secrets and throw your prayers their way. I’m gonna ask for a ride on a UFO and a sweet conspiracy adventure where I can’t trust anyone. I’m already with the feds. No really. I’m a F-emale B-ody I-nspector.

Steampunk Paranormal Ghost Hunter Costume

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Steampunk Paranormal Ghost Hunter Costume
Now I can have my own ghost hunter show thanks to this awesome Steampunk Paranormal Ghost Hunter Costume. Cuz you gotta look the part when you’re pulling on fishing line and making stuff fly across the room for profit.

I gotta work on perfecting my upper crust A-hole Victorian accent. It comes with a cemetery hat, an old timey coat, vest, scarf, gloves and shirt. Plus Neon Ecto Bait Tube that glows under blacklight, a vial of Authentic Tombstone Az, Boot Hill Dirt that acts as Ghost protection, an animated/ Vocal Spirit Containment Lantern, and a Neon Blue Finger Light that illuminates You.

SWEET! I ain’t ‘fraid o no ghost.
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Baby Chupacabras

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Baby Chupacabras
Don’t let these Baby Chupacabras fool you. Sure, they look cute and like they are partying during mardi-gras , but they have been known to rip your face off rather than asking to see your boobs and giving you beads. Well, they do that too, but that’s not the point. They were created in a government lab to look FAB-u-LESS and flamboyant. I say mission accomplished.

I feel like they are missing their accessories: A bong, a blunt and some bling. Hard to believe these guys are the ones sucking blood out of goats.
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Green Glass Eyeball Ring

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Green Glass Eyeball Ring
Keep your eye on the prize. Or you know, on your finger. This Green Glass Eyeball Ring is all seeing, all knowing, and all eyeball. Now I’m no pupil of style and fashion, but I’ll ask my friend Iris what she thinks. Get it? That was just a cornea little eyeball joke. You know what they say, booty is in the eye of the beholder. No, I didn’t mistype beauty. Booty is what I look at. It’s in my eye most hours of the day and I am the beholder. I have probably even seen your butt and approved.

Anyway, back to the ring. Not like *ding-ding* entering the boxing ring. This eye ring silly. It’s not bloodshot, it’s not yellow. All in all it’s very healthy looking. I say go for it. Though I can’t tell if it smells, so there is a chance they’ll give ya the stink-eye.
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