Bizarre Two Headed Mummy

twin terrorsThis monstrosity looks like every annoying teen duo that you have ever seen at the mall, just gabbing away at each other’s faces like sugar-fueled little rottweilers barking things like “OMG”, “I know, right!”, “That was so totes brill Bethany!”, and other stupid things at each other. These terror twins just have more rotted skin and yet are less emaciated than the mall rat variety. They are also much smarter and less likely to get hit by a bus while checking a text, saying, “OMG guys! It’s from Brad!”

These two are BFFs, literally. Connected for all time. They look just as shallow as mall vermin, but they won’t run their gobs non-stop at you. It only looks like they are talking each other’s decaying heads off. Only $625 on Ebay.

One more shot below.
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Oil Painting Of A Monkey Man In His Natural Habitat

monkey manThis oil painting on canvas is only $169.90 on Ebay. He’s just chillin’. Waiting on some bananas. Looking kinda sad because he has no monkey man buddies to fling his poo at/with.

I want to pet him, but I know I would just get Monkey Man rabies. And I really don’t trust anything that resembles Richard Gere.

Travesty in a Teacup

travesty in a tea cupMake tea time a time of terror and dread with this Travesty in a Teacup. This guy loves crashing tea parties, keeping down below the surface, until you take a sip and feel a tentacle entering your mouth and spit tea everywhere. He was born of tea and he will die in tea.

He is your new master and he loathes your choice of Chamomile, demanding a strongly brewed Earl Grey. Do his bidding at once and always keep the cup full.

Only $95 from Etsy.

Apocalypse Ready Squirrel Taxidermy

Apocalypse Ready Squirrel TaxidermyThis Squirrel is prepared for the apocalypse. Are you? He has his machine gun, gas mask, extra ammo belt and some ear protection for target practice. This rodent is ready for action. Mount him on your wall as a reminder that you must be prepared.

When the Zombies come and the mutant dogs and wolves run in packs, you’ll wish you had the foresight that this squirrel had. He is only $155 from Etsy seller Rickscustompottery. We can all learn alot from this little guy.
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Life-Sized Alien With CD-Rack

alien cd rackNow is your chance to own the most out of this world CD rack with a Life-Sized Alien from Etsy seller RhythmFashion. This alien has a taste for Psytrance music, which is why he comes with a whole collection of it. When not abducting people from their beds or piloting crazy flying saucer spaceships, he just likes to chill and zone out.

It has a custom LED Light connected on top of the rack and comes with remote control. There are 16 color choices,5 brightness levels and more. This will be the weirdest $6,700.00 you’ve ever spent.
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