Tag: gives me nightmares

Baby Head Candles: Burn Baby Burn!

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Baby Head Candles Burn Baby Burn!
Burn baby burn! Dissscccooo infernoooooo! Burn the mother down! Who says to themselves, “You know I need some candle light. Just to set the mood and chill. You know what would be good? If I could burn a candle that looked like an innocent and gentle baby’s head.”

I have no idea who says that, but these Baby Head Candles are scented too. Hopefully with scents other than “I just pooped my pants” and “I’ve been sitting in pee for an hour”. I’d use these. A baby with fire coming out of it’s head? Sign me up. That’s one hardcore and badass baby. I think it just needs a full wax body and a guitar!

Weird Baby Doll Head Lamp

Artemis Winterford1 Comment

baby doll head lamp
Wow. I knew I shouldn’t have had a kid. I leave ya alone for like five minutes and you have a light bulb in your head and you’re stitched up like a turkey. You are a real dim bulb! Nah. I’m just kidding. This isn’t mine. This is a Weird Baby Doll Head Lamp I found on Etsy. I can see my kid having a light bulb for a head, but not that fancy on/off switch in his belly button. My kid’s would be much bigger because, genetics.

This one is a smart kid though. Can’t figure out how to wear a shirt? Just find mommy’s thread and sew yourself one so you look like a Nike. Hey at least he had plenty of light to work by. Stop playing with your switch junior. No! No! Bad baby! Don’t you dim your light at me.

Alien Xenomorph Queen Lamp

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aliens lamp
Etsy seller Kreatworks creates all kinds of awesome and scary alien sculptures. Most of them cost way more than I have saved in my piggybank. I know, because I just busted the thing open and counted it all up before walking down the street and spending my life savings on a Kit Kat bar. Well, THAT was a tasty retirement! Back to work now!

Anyway, this Alien Xenomorph Queen Lamp is all kinds of scary and awesome. It will totally watch you all night long as you watch it back, until you are a nervous wreck and hiding under the blankets, cursing the fact that you soiled yourself.

Lesson learned. Some things are just too scary to have in your bedroom. The next morning you decide that it would look much better in your toddler’s room.
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Creepy Haunted Doll From The Island Of Dolls

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haunted dollIf old decayed creepy dolls give you nightmares, you might want to look away and move onto the next article. If you click through to read about this one, you can’t say I didn’t warn you. Read more “Creepy Haunted Doll From The Island Of Dolls”

Don’t Turn Your Back On This Creepy Doll

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creepy dollAt first glance, this doll looks like a cheap, cheesy tourist trap souvenir. Your eyes see that bright and happy colored dress that it’s holding a cheery little fruit basket. First impressions can be deceiving though and before you know it, you are lured in and under its soul sucking spell. Read more “Don’t Turn Your Back On This Creepy Doll”