This set of Alien Head Salt And Pepper Shakers is what you want on the table when you abduct your next dinner guest. As any alien knows, it is only polite to feed them first, before you go anal probing the subject. Wine ’em, dine ’em, then confine ’em. That’s my motto! Wait! That came out wrong. I mean, if I was an alien.
This is a swell spread guys. You are the best dinner hosts an abductee could want. Thanks for the meal. And here I was worried that I was going to be subjected to experimentation. Ha! You guys are alright! What’s next? I have plenty of room for dessert!*rubs tummy*
*Four sets of black eyes turn toward me* The leader sends me a telepathic answer:
Uranus.
*Jaw drops to the table.* *Passes out and falls forward into a bowl of mashed potatoes.*
Finally there is a soap dispenser that will wash away the stink of alien abduction. Because the way things are right now you can scrub and scrub and never feel clean. This soap dispenser was designed by Duncan Shotton. This 
These aliens have been abducting us and checking out our anatomy for decades. It’s about time we do the same to them. Teach your kids all about alien anatomy with this 
This hand carved miniature 
It took these backdoor probing freaks a while, but they finally realized they were getting nowhere abducting hayseeds and set their sights on a more worthy endeavor. Abducting cheeseburgers!