Tag: etsy

Satanic Nativity Krampus Creche

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Satanic Nativity Krampus Creche
This is a nutty nativity. Wow. Two Krampus items in one day. Like Kanye West, I think this one comes to you straight from the Illuminati. This is going to be a special nativity to add to your holiday decorations. The Krampus is born! In the little town of Death-lehem! See what I did there? You might say that Krampus arrived by immaculate deception.

It comes with assorted demons and everything you need to celebrate the birth of Krampus. I think I see the three wise men. The guy with two heads, carrying the third head hung from their belt. Then there’s baby Krampus in the manger going all goo-goo and ga-ga and probably pooping himself. Not sure which one’s are brosef and Mary. This is a pretty frightful nativity for your shelf

Merry Krampus to all and to all, a good night!
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Facehugger Appetizer 3-Piece Set

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Facehugger Appetizer 3-Piece Set
Is there anything more appetizing than a slimy Facehugger attaching itself to your face and giving you a big hug? Of course not. That’s why you need this Facehugger Appetizer 3-Piece Set. Your hors d’oeuvres will taste so much better when dangling under an alien killer.

Okay, how many of you said “whores de-vores” in your head and giggled? Me too. Now let’s serve up some tiny weenies and cheese cubes cuz food is the best facehugger ever.

Zombie Mickey And Minnie Mouse Tea-Light Holders

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Zombie Mickey And Minnie Mouse Tea-Light Holders
These Zombie Mickey And Minnie Mouse Tea-Light Holders show the true undead faces of this Disney couple. Put some candles in their heads and set the mood. A dark and horror-themed mood, with you dining alone on some Mac and Cheese…with two zombie mice staring at you. Ready to kill. Yet they never do, night after horror-filled night.

Sorry. My future just flashed before my eyes.

Puppet Head And Hands Taxidermy Trophies

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Puppet Head And Hands Taxidermy Trophies
I’m really digging these Puppet Head And Hands Taxidermy Trophies, but I want to request a Tickle Me Elmo version, to see what Elmo would look like after I tickled him with a shotgun out in the wild. I’d also like to see some of those Fraggle Rock dudes mounted on my wall. Puppets and I have a weird history. A weird and bloody history. *Shudders.*

The seller has several. But no Elmo damnit! They make great coat racks. Things are creeping me out.
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Hellraiser Lamp

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Hellraiser Lamp
I am so ready to raise hell! That’s why I can’t wait for my awesome Hellraiser Lamp to arrive. It’s here! Plug that bad boy in. Here goes. All kinds of hell is about to be raised. Lock up your daughters, lock up your wives, lock up the back door and run for your life! Here goes! *Switches lamp on.* That’s what I’m talkin’ bout! Wooooooo! Raising all kinds of hell up in dis biatch! *Turns lamp off*

That was honestly the most excitement I’ve had in years. I’m off to have a smoke and enjoy the after-glow. Phew! Gotta be honest, it’s gonna be hard to get back to my boring old life after that.