Tag: decor

Freaky Gray Alien Art

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weird grey alien art
Etsy seller ponyclubgallery makes all kinds of painting involving alien grays. I’m not saying he’s in league with them or anything, but you know what they say. Paint what you know. This guy obviously knows alien grays and you know what that means. It means someone had missing time and woke up in a cornfield buttsore. But enough about me.

If displaying artwork featuring our alien/illuminati masters is your thing, head over to his shop and check them all out. He’s got aliens as pilgrims, aliens with dogs, aliens doing religious stuff… Heck the only thing missing is aliens playing poker. Good stuff. Weird, but good stuff.
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Scented Beer Bottle Candles

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Beer Bottle Candles
These Scented Beer Bottle Candles are perfect for your mancave. For once you won’t have to get drunk and spill your beer in the wife’s candle to have a beer scented candle. Or spill wax in your beer bottle. Etsy seller UReflections
has done all of the work for you.

No more dumping beer on the carpet to get that smell. Now you can have fresh beer scent even if you don’t live in a beer splattered pigsty of your own making. We truly are living in the future.

Tentacle Porthole Lamp

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Tentacle Porthole Lamp
There’s a tentacle in my porthole. That sounds like a personal problem to me. Maybe while it’s in there it can give you a checkup. Why you- This post brought to you by the letter V. For the voices. In my head.

Now that the meds have kicked in and everything is going smoothly, I present to you this Tentacle Porthole Lamp. It’s as if a giant Kraken attacked a ship and was nice enough to bring it’s own light for you to die by. This thing is realistic as hell. I feel like I’ve been slimed just by looking at it. This is gonna look awesome in that Kraken themed room I’ve been planning. I have a lot of work to do. Better get Kraken!
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Yeti And Werewolf Faux Taxidermy

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Yeti and Werewolf Taxidermy
These Yeti and Werewolf heads are awesome. Why do I need a Yeti or a Werewolf head on my wall, looking like they tried to bust into my room like the Kool-Aid man, but got stuck when their fat heads came through? I just do. With a Yeti head on my wall I can have a Yeti sighting anytime I want. I’ll even go the extra mile and call it in to one of these Yeti sighting hotlines.

“Did you see a Yeti?”
Mocks her tone. Did you see a yeti? Yes. Yes I did.
“Where did you see it sir?”
In my livingroom. It’s looking at me right now.
“Are you in danger sir?”
Me? Pffft. I’m just chillin’ with a beer.
“Sir. You really should take this seriously. You are clogging up the lines for people who are really in danger.”
Whatevs. They don’t exist no how! Thanks for the drunk dialing adventure. Click.

Later that night… *Strange grinding noise is shaking the whole house. Sounds like some weird breathy electric saw too. Turns on the light to see an actual Yeti dry humping and having it’s way with my monster head.*
Oh, Hell no! Bad Yeti. Swats it with a rolled up newspaper. It runs away, darting out a window and leaving my now defiled monster head on the floor.

What the s**t! I guess they do exist!
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Dragon Lawn Flamingos

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dragon flamingo
Lawn flamingos are soooo 1950s trailer park. These days it’s all about dragons. Because dragons are awesome and breath fire and fly through the sky like they own that shizz. Cuz they do. I’ve seen the deed. You don’t mess with dragons. That’s why you should decorate your yard with these Dragon Lawn Flamingos from Etsy seller CedarMoon.

I just ordered like 5. I’m using them as bait. I’m hoping it will attract that chick from Game of Thrones. She’ll see them in my yard and be all like, “OMG dragons. Can I be your Queen?” I’ll be all like, “Yeah, but I only have one throne and that ain’t no game on Taco night. Cool?”
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