There’s something on me. Get it off! Get it off! What is it? Oh it’s cute. In the way all things are cute after it’s flesh has vaporized. Look at this Sterling Silver Bat Skeleton Necklace. It’s adorable. Look at him feeding from that woman’s neck. He ain’t gonna stop until she’s completely dry. He’s a little Vampire bat. Who’s the cute wittle vampire wampire bat? He just wants to hug. Hug and suck the life force out of you.
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Tag: halloween
Victorian Eye Rings
Victorian Eye Rings. No, not rings for your eye. I don’t even know how that would work. No, I mean rings that are eyes. These are super awesome too because you can be all like, “Give me a knuckle sandwich will ya? I’m gonna give you 5 eyes to the face sucka!” Cuz I would have one on each finger. I’d run my tongue across all of them before I punched the dude too, cuz you have to lay on the creepy and psych him out.
Hey, what’s with that third eye in the pic? Is it okay? Looks like it has glaucoma. Looks like we have a Third Eye Blind concert. You walked right into that one. Not really, I kinda put you on a conveyor belt and waited patiently. Who says we can’t all see eye to eye? Put on your eye rings and give me a fist bump.
Concrete Cyclops Skull
Okay Cyclops Skull, keep an eye on the garden for me. Get it? If you do just say aye! I kid, I kid. I just like talking to my garden decorations. Say, I need to plug in the weed whacker. Do you have a spare socket? Zing! Burn! I got you so good. We are having so much pun. Wanna hear some music? I’ll get my eye-pad. Where is it? Hmmm. Keep an eye out for me will ya? Man, I crack myself up. *Drops skull in garden* Laterz. Eye have to go eat!
Next day…
*Walks out to the garden whistling. Trips over cyclops skull and gets impaled by a rake. Dying…* Eye…Eye…Eye sorry. Ha ha ha erg gasp choke gurgle dead.
Skull Full Of Souls Box
This Skull Full Of Souls Box is a great place to keep all of your trinkets, candy,dice, whatever. Tormented souls are all over thing thing. Kinda like this blog. *Rim shot* Nah. I love ya all even if you do have problems. And I’m saying that wearing a sequinned dress made out of meat as I kick back glass after glass of whiskey.
Don’t judge. Not my fault I Quantum Leap all over the place. Once I set stuff right, I’m outta here. Today was “Try a sequinned dress made out of meat” day. Still haven’t leaped. Running out of ideas. F Lady Gaga anyway. *Falls and breaks neck.*
*Blue light everywhere. Leaping! I’m leaping!*
Oh THATS what needed to be set right!
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Gothic Mansion Portraits Make Your Walls Weird
I don’t need this because my family portraits are all weird already, but these Gothic Mansion Portraits will put weirdos all over your walls. These Gothic Mansion Portraits will add an eerie air to the hallways and walls in your haunted house or office. You get two 65″ x 33.5″ sheets to make a scene over 5′ tall. Pretty freaky, therefore pretty awesome.
Now your house will look spooky and scary all year round. Note to whoever owns the Amityville house, your house already looks weird enough. Really. It has eyes. It can’t get any scarier.