Damnit Dexter, I’m gonna ask you for the last time. Are you sleeping with my wife? Really? I found this under the bed? Seriously?… The local butcher eh? Suddenly all those insane deals she gets on meats makes sense. It also explains that 20 pound case of Hot Dogs in the freezer. Let me ask ya Dex. About that code of yours. Does this guy fit? Need some meat?
Ha ha. Very funny. That’s what he said. You are a riot Dex!
The world has known many mythical terrors: Bigfoot, The Jersey Devil, The Loch Ness Monster, Miley Cyrus, and of course El Chupacabra. Some say this creature is a government experiment gone wrong. Others speculate that aliens dropped him off on our planet. Personally, I think a stray dog got some bad Taco Bell and instead of getting the three-alarm intestinal fire/three rolls of Charmin runs, like the rest of us, it got horribly mutated instead. What the hell do they put in that stuff?
Read more “Two Headed Chupacabra”
Light up your desk space with something steampunk. I recommend this steampunk lamp that looks like a robot skull. One that just had a bright idea. Ding! It is $350 dollars. I just had an idea myself. Give him a shade in the shape of a bowler hat. Skeletons love bowler hats.
Maggots are all the rage this season and the latest accessory is this squirmy/bloody Maggot Hair Clip found on Etsy. On the plus side, your lice will be crapping themselves when these putrid things join them in your dandruff pool.
Read more “Lice Leveled Up: Maggot Hair Clip”
Check out this skeleton headpiece from Etsy seller Twinklybits. This glitter infested corpse has it’s arms all wide like, “Now you look FAB-U-LESS. Take me to the market. I need ingredients for Margaritas and Fajitas. Walk slower, I’m getting all saddle sore you silly goose. Onward, before I give you a fanny massage that will rub you bald my little stallion!”
Read more “A Skeleton On The Head Is Worth Two In The Graveyard”