Tag: morbid arts and crafts

Have A Pixie Infestation? Get A Pixie Trap

Artemis WinterfordLeave a comment

pixie trapYeah I know. Pixies are so beautiful. They just flutter around, spewing glitter from their wings, granting virgins free wishes and making flowers glow in vibrant colors with their passing. I’ve seen the propaganda. The truth is that Pixies are pests. And pests need to be eliminated. With extreme prejudice. That’s what Pixie traps are for.

Sadly, this humorous piece from Etsy seller BlueMaiya is no longer avilable, but if you ask nicely maybe she will make you one. It was inspired by Brian Froud’s pressed fairies.

Build Your Own Human Skeleton Book

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build your own skeletonMake your own bony life sized companion with this cool Build Your Own Human Skeleton Book. I’m gonna call mine Bones for obvious reasons.

This is an awesome cardboard/paper model. Perfect for Medical students who are lonely, because it is basically an instant friend. It comes with labels so you can identify the different bones too. I just ordered mine. Gonna make a trip to the grocery store, buy like 40 pounds of steak and slap some meat on those bones. Then, during the next lightning storm, I’m bringing this thing to life. Get your torches and pitchforks ready.
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Knitted Alien Autopsy: The Truth Is In There…In His Guts

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alien autopsy crochetThis knitted alien autopsy from Etsy seller aKNITomy is the adorable way to slice and dice aliens. For science of course. You can get the PDF pattern for $4.50 and make one for yourself. If we figure out how these guys work on the inside, we may be able to stop them from appearing in the night and probing our rectums.
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Set The Mood With Poop Candles

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poop candlesThese poop candles look like stinky sticks of dynamite. Good thing they aren’t, because I would want a longer fuse. You don’t want to be anywhere near these when they go off. Luckily they are just candles. Lumpy(and probably nutty and corn-filled) candles.

Check out the lumpiness and girth on these bad boys. You would really have to strain and practice some deep breathing to get these things out of your bowels. Then, once you did, you would need a good long break to sit there and pant, regain your breath. These are some seriously unhealthy Cleveland Steamers. If your biz looks like this, go coffin shopping right now.

They smell like roses and are bound to keep things classy in your home. More shots below.
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Weird Friday The 13th Taxidermy Diorama Starring Chicken Voorhees

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Weird Friday The 13th Taxidermy Diorama Starring Chicken VoorheesHey Friday the 13th fans. There is a new reboot of the franchise. This one stars a dead baby chick as Jason Voorhees. You can buy it on eBay. This diorama is appropriately called Camp Crystal Lake. He looks like he just made a fresh kill. $120 bucks and it is yours.