Category: Just Plain Weird

Road Kill Toys: They’re In A Better Place Now

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roadkill plush toys
Road kill. There’s them that kills ’em and keeps on driving and them that eat’s ’em and thanks ’em for dyin’! Get yourself a snugly and cuddly creature who has been smooshed into a pancake with it’s guts sticking out. I’m getting one of these Road Kill Toys for my nephew. It’s educational. It will teach him to look twice before crossing the street. And make him cry.

These already-been-killed stuffed animals feature zipped sides that let you pack their spilled organs back in. Plus each one comes in its own clear plastic body bag. Nice!
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Fully Posable Kewpie Dolls

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Fully Posable Kewpie Dolls
These Fully Posable Kewpie Dolls turn Kewpie dolls into action heroes. Check out that crazy cherub doing a Karate Kick. Kewpies dolls are back and this time it’s personal! I mean, not that personal, like they’re going full identity theft or anything. They aren’t gonna show up at your place of business and talk your boss or anything. I mean they are all up in your face doing karate moves and kicking butt without a single piece of clothing. Kewpie dolls don’t need no stinkin’ clothes!

These guys are naked and weird vengeance unleashed and unhinged. These babies don’t go goo-gaah and drool and poopy in their diapers, because guess what? No diapers! Only wings. God help you if you encounter a small swarm.
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Wearable Japanese Futon

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monster shaving kit
It’s almost as if I said to the universe, “Universe, I’m not nearly fat and lazy enough. You think you could send a product my way that will let me just fall down and sleep on a futon that I am already wearing? Cool. Thanks. You’re the best.” and he answered me!

I mean, judging by the picture, it looks like this Wearable Japanese Futon was made for Vulcans, but this will do! Thanks God. And I’m sorry about that whole Ten commandments thing, I really thought it was more of a checklist. I’ll do better! Pinky promise!
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Monster Coffin Framed Prints

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etsy monster coffin
These monster art prints from Etsy seller bwanadevilart will decorate your walls in monsters, all in coffin shaped frames. All of your favorites are available like the Wolfman, Frankenstein, Vampires and more. I already have a picture of Frankenstein and his bride. It’s called a wedding photo. It’s super cute. She’s all hissing at me and I just look like Herman Munster, only scared as hell. It was a fun day. The day before I mean. The last day of freedom is always the sweetest. I remember it well. I did the mash. The monster mash! It really was a graveyard smash. Now the wife spends all my cash.

How do I always get sidetracked? ADD? I don’t think so, but how would I know? I would forget, wouldn’t I? Anyway, I better get back to whatever it was I was doing before. Oh yeah. No, that wasn’t it.
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Tentacle Toilet Paper Roll Holder

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tentacle toilet paper holder
I’ve been grunting and groaning for like an hour here. Even completed like 3 crossword puzzles. Time to wipe. Wanna lend me a tentacle here Cthulhu? Ah, thanks bud. You take good care of me. You’ve seen things in this room that would shock lesser beings, but you always come through.

This Tentacle Toilet Paper Roll Holder is ready to serve up butt-paper whenever you need it. I like to shake his tentacle after, just out of respect. Give it a little fist bump, followed by an explosion. I like it. He complains that I didn’t wash my hands first. He’s got a point.